Let’s start this off with a hypothetical (or not so hypothetical) situation. You are riding your horse. You want to turn left, but your horse turns right.
Was your horse wrong to do that?
You answered that question in your head almost immediately after you read it, didn’t you? In this three part series, we’re going to dig deep into what is really happening in your horse’s mind, and how we can work with that to achieve a consistently positive outcome – for both of you.
What your answer was depends on how you typically conduct yourself in potentially confrontational situations. There are generally three different responses here. Let’s look at them.
The Thought Process
|“The horse must obey me because I am the human.”||The horse was wrong, it’s not my fault and I’d better speak to the trainer.|
|“Oops, ha ha! We’ll just go with it and try it again next time!”||Who cares anyway? Sometimes it works out and sometimes it doesn’t.|
|“Oh crap! I messed it up again!”||I blame yourself. It has to be my fault! What am I doing wrong?!?|
What would you do? What should we do? We’re going to chat about a fourth option.
Lets start by looking at an indisputable fact:
Whatever your horse does, he has a reason for doing it.
In his mind it is the right thing. A horse’s mind – and then his body, if left to follow his thought – will be drawn to the highest pressure. That might be the gate, his buddy or running in fear. Read my last article on Teaching Horses to Handle Pressure for some great insight on this.
Here is my thought. You’re both right. You have a good reason for wanting to go left and he has a good reason for wanting to go right. If, in your mind, the horse is wrong then you’re having a conversation breakdown. No different than if you disagree with a person.
Let’s touch on conversation. What is the most important trait of a good conversationalist? That’s right! Being a good listener. In addition to that, one of the most important jobs of a good leader is causing our followers to want to follow us. The solution – our fourth option – then, is a combination of the two.
One of the biggest blunders we can make – and believe me I’ve made it a million times – is not listening to the horse. It happens. You might be on a trail ride with some buddies and focused on your conversation more than you are your horse. He might be giving you subtle signs, but you’re not picking them up because you’re fixated on your friends tale of Facebook drama.
The good thing though, is that we can remedy this easily. The horse has a simple language that doesn’t take us long to learn. If, that is, we commit to learning it.
Let’s look at our example again. We desire a left turn. For that to be successful, we need the following:
- Knowledge of where our our horse’s mind is. If he’s under pressure, thinking of escape routes, thinking of his buddy or just about anything else, then one fact is clear: he is NOT thinking of following our focus.
- We must present a focus that the horse can follow in the first place. If we don’t provide him with something to follow, it should be no surprise that he does what he wants. And in my mind, he’s justified in doing so. Watch my Horsemanship Top Ten video on Situational Awareness to learn more.
Learning to communicate in the language of the horse should be a prerequisite to riding and should be the starting point for all lessons, coaching and training. If we lack an understanding of horse psychology or physiology we will eventually get frustrated, resort to force (kicking, pulling, submission) or at the worst, get injured.
Stay tuned for Part Two to figure out how we take this dilemma to a great outcome!